Relation-situation-ship-$h!t.

Some of you Mother Fu(ker$, Kill me. Like Literally, and you wont like this post. If you don't like it, re-read it, and then share it with a friend. (Please, and Thank You.)

We get an email, the Plant Fire is possibly going to make the air quality bad. Since I'm an educator in Pasadena, we got the day off. A day to sleep late (which means 8:00 a.m.) and a day to get Honey her shots. She hates the experience I don't blame her, but its necessary. (she will sleep for the rest of the day, she gets horrible anxiety.)

But I bring you to the cause/reason behind todays post. As I sat at the Vet waiting with my Honey, the dog. I decided to take a walk on the wild side. Venture into the world of....

"Un-answered DM's (cue the scary theme music...)"

An old friend of mine once told me, that she doesn't answer blocked numbers, she said they were nothing but trouble. I took a page out of her book and started to do the same, not only with blocked numbers, but numbers I don't have saved. If its really something important my belief is that they have nothing to hide, (so they wont call me blocked) and also, they will shoot me a text/voicemail.

I sort of take that same mentality with Messages on Instagram (my only form of social media) If its something that's ok or appropriate for you to say to me, you will gladly, openly, and honestly post it in my messages under my post. In the DM, its almost as if you don't want others to see what it is you're saying. I give the women a pass that want to ask me about working out/fitness, Hair techniques/tutorials, or even travel. But you dudes are literally Volcanoes, erupting HOT SHIT.

This message comes today as a one of my DM's was from a guy. Lets call him "Number #2" Same thing you do when you have to go to the restroom to take a dump. "Number #2" got it? good.

Number 2 has sent me a message some time ago apparently. But I have my instagram set to not allow people that I don't follow to message me directly. I have to physically go into the waiting messages to see these. As I said, bored waiting on the doctor to see my doggie, I started fishing through the messages.

The message started out with. "Yoooooooo! Fye!"

Not going to lie, It is really difficult for me to know what to respond to when people send me messages like this. I am typically just sitting there with a dumbfounded look on my face. I'm truly working on the art of leaving message "seen" without a response. A guy friend of mine told me I need to get better at that, and another told me to get used to using that blocked button, lol. (I'm learning daily, lol)

So I sent back a "Thumbs up👍🏾 (meaning cool) Praying hands🙏🏾 (meaning Thank you) and a Flexed Bicep💪🏾 (to signify working out/strength)

They asked "How are you? FB! Plz"

I responded, "Great, I don't have one"

I personally got off Facebook a few years ago because my ex was just so rude, and I literally couldn't stand to see his page, he got mad at me because I didn't want to be friends initially. I already knew he was a "tool" off facebook, I couldn't stand to have the whole world see him in action knowing I was on FB letting the shit happen. I digress, as I said before, I don't have a Facebook.

They respond. "Follow Back lol"

I respond "OK"

They respond. "Thank you!"

I respond with a "👍🏾"

They ask "Where are you from" Even though, like most of the other people on social media, I actually post a little bit of information in my bio, so that it can eliminate some of those types of questions. But I know, everyone doesn't pay attention to detail like I do. I digress....

I respond "Texas" I know it is a general statement, I figure if I needed to get to the point where I give my true location then so be it. Lol. For now, Im from Texas, the largest state, Texas, Our Texas, which is 790 miles long and 660 miles wide at its most distant points. Yep. lmbo. Find me in "Texas" lol.

They respond "Oh ok, I'm trying to get to know you."

Of course, I take a moment to go and skim the page of the person that is "trying" to get to know me. This is typically what goes through my mind, and a few things I honestly look at.

1. To see what they look like.

2. See what they're about. (Family, Travel, Friends, Social)

3. Try to decipher what type of life they have based off their page.

4. Are they into fitness (out of shape? or donut shaped)

5. Do they have a girlfriend, many hoes, a wife, an array of pictures of beautiful women, a boo, a bae, a WIFE, a bunch of booty pics, a stalker ex, lmao.

6. Do they work? Do they have a job? Do they have a career.

7. Followers. (the last thing I pay attention to, possibly should be the first)

Look I know a lot of you people say "I'm private about my life, so I show/post what I want." Hell we all are, and we all pick and choose what we want the world to see, but there is a fine line between being private, and hiding $h!t.

Some of ya'll are married and your page looks like you're just as single as me. Some of you married folks don't want folks to know you married so you can play the single game, Believe me, I see it all time, Whatever type of life you choose to live, own your $h!t. If you're married, tell folks, I'm married but I cheat on my husband/wife. I'm not happy at home, but I want to stay married so I can have a "safety net." Or get a divorce, and fall into the abyss of single-ness. lmmfao. Pick one.

Live in your truth.

I was involved with a married man, ONLY one. It was fun, it was carefree, it was passionate, the sex was Bomb AF. We shared a intense connection. But It was also one of the worst decisions I've ever made. It was REALLY sucky when my ex called the husbands wife to let her know that I had slept with her husband. I was embarrassed, but I was honest and real with this woman and told her the truth. It hurt like hell, because I still wanted to have a good relationship with the married man, but I knew it was wrong. My ex wanted to embarrass me, I don't know if he ever received satisfaction for embarrassing me, but It surely didn't make me want to be any closer to him. It was one of the final straws, this came after he called my Dad to tell him I slept with a married man. He called my dad to say "You think your daughter is so great, but she is a Home-Wrecking Whore" So.... I said all that to say, I'm really good on fu(k!ng other peoples husbands and boyfriends. Moving on...

A marriage is a covenant, and yes the people who enter into it are the most responsible for upholding their vows that they profess before their families, and God. But we are ALL are ultimately responsible for our actions. Its too many single people out here to be messing with married folks. I digress AGAIN...

So I began my search, and boom. There is a picture of the person, with a woman, Cheek to cheek, lips puckered. Now before I jump to conclusions, I decided to ask the question (to their initial question "I'd like to get to know you" )"In what way?"

They respond "In every way"

I though to myself, This could go either way.... is this woman a sister, a long time friend, a best friend, a potential lover/girlfriend, or an ex/freind that has passed away? Don't want to jump to conclusions, but my page truly looks like I'm a single woman. May be one picture of me and an ex. But I'll gladly address anyone who asks. I figure what do I have to lose by confronting this stranger about who this woman may or may not be??? Since I am 36 and realized a long time ago, that I don't have too much time for bullshit, I decided to screen shot the photo and ask... "Would she be OK with that?

He responds, "You're right. No"

I respond, "Have a nice Day. 👍🏾"

Look, I could've ignored that picture. I could've said nothing of it. I could've chosen to ignore it. I could have decided to take him up on his offer. Go out on a few dates, dinner, have sex. Only to at one point realize, this man was involved with someone else. It either leads to heartbreak, or him eventually doing the same thing to me. Because either way I slice it, it shows that he doesn't have respect for his relationship, and why would he miraculously have any respect for me if he and I were to get in a relationship. Just something to consider, just facts. See below. (Exhibit A, lmao)

I'm not gonna blast this dudes relationship for the respect of this woman, and for the respect I have for myself. I'm really trying to steer clear of the bullshit. My conscious will be clear and free from drama. Happy hump day guys. (This guy wont be humping me ANYTIME. lol.)